DEAR METAL GUY

Dear Metal Guy,
Lately, I’ve been bored with my life. Even my favorite Carpenter’s or Sonny and Cher albums can’t seem to get me out of this funk. I even tried doing outside things like bird watching or searching for rare stamps. I just can’t seem to get that rush. My friends tell me I’m a “dork”, but that can’t be it. I like a good virgin daiquiri like the next guy (enjoyed at a restaurant with my mother, of course). What can I do to get me out of this rut?

  • Funked in Fargo